In January 2024, Grayson Murray had just won his second PGA tournament. He was a good-looking guy, and engaged. He was 30 years old, playing golf for a living, and seemingly on top of the world. Life was his oyster. On May 25, 2024, Murray was dead.
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Grayson Murray’s struggles with sobriety were no secret. He made it public in 2021 when he tweeted his frustrations blaming, in part the PGA. He lashed out:
“Why was I drunk? Because I’m a f—ing alcoholic that hates everything to do with the PGA Tour life and that’s my scapegoat.”
PGA disputed that it didn’t help, or try to help, Murray. It issued a statement:
“We can unequivocally say that the PGA Tour is a family, and when a member of that family needs help, we are there for him. That has been the case here and will continue to be.”
That was three years ago. With a rehab under his belt and mounting success on tour, Murray was unquestionably headed in the right direction. By May 2024, he was one of best golfers on the PGA tour. He seemed to have his life under control. But he withdrew from this week’s tournament and by Saturday, he was dead. The cause of death wasn’t announced but it is fair to say that if the monster of addiction didn’t come back to grab hold, it may have been one of the related demons that haunts too many of us.
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I have watched many people in my life struggle, not just with chemical addiction but with the demon of depression. Often, they are bedfellows. Like most people, I have struggled with depression and occasionally resorted to alcohol as a coping mechanism. I learned quickly that it doesn’t lessen the depression, it just dulls it. Fortunately, I didn’t spend much time trying to drive depression from my life with alcohol. Instead, I have relied on family and friends for support, which often comes with just sitting down and talking to someone. Or a round of golf. I truly love my time on the golf course because I spend hours with some of my best friends.
My sister struggled with addiction, and it killed her. I have often wondered if I could have done more to help her. Maybe I could have spent more time just talking to her about her depression over losing “her man,” or that her abusing pills wasn’t going to help. I didn’t do those things. I guess my excuse was my age – but that won’t bring my sister back.
I will talk to any friend or family member struggling with depression or addiction, and maybe Grayson Murray’s death will remind me to be proactive if I think someone is struggling.
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A fellow PGA golfer, Peter Malnati, was asked to speak about Grayson Murrey after his round today. He got about five seconds in before he broke down in tears. His message was that yes, pro golfers seem to be on top of the world, but he said, through sobs:
“In the end, we are all just humans.”
No one is an island. We all need help. If you are hurting or think someone else is hurting, reach out for a hug or give a hug. We are all just humans.
Grayson Murray seemed to be on top of the world, but maybe he felt alone up there. Reach out. You will never regret asking someone, “Are you okay?”