Can You Smell the Fear From Eric Swalwell? (In His Case, That Smell May Be … Something Else)

  

The strong odor everyone detected yesterday coming from the Democrats after Donald Trump sat down for a two-hour interview with Elon Musk on Monday night was the distinctive aroma of fear. In the case of infamous farter Eric Swalwell, however, it is entirely possible the scent of fear might be mixed with some other unpleasant emanation coming from the vicinity of his rear end. 

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We won’t go too hard on Swalwell about his incontinent flatulence though. The fact that he slept with a Chinese spy for campaign cash is far more disgraceful and, more recently, the way he got housed by Ben Shapiro in a Congressional hearing is at least as funny.

The Trump-Musk interview maintained well over one million persistent viewers throughout its duration on Monday. Yesterday, rebroadcasts and retweets on Twitter and many other social media platforms had viewership reaching well over 70 million. Overall impressions online topped one billion. It might be the most viewed interview of this writer’s lifetime, in fact.

Despite all of that, this is how Fang Fang’s boyfriend reacted to the tsunami of views and reactions:

LOL. ‘Heard by no one.’ Oh Eric, oh honey … what is you doin’?

Not only did everyone hear it, but we are also certain that Swalwell was among them, probably crying with jealousy that no one would ever be that interested in anything that comes out of his mouth. 

It probably goes without saying that Twitter ratioed Swalwell into the sun for this tweet. But we’re going to say it anyway because it’s fun and it makes us giggle with happiness. 

Twenty-six million was just the initial number. As we mentioned, that number climbed into the stratosphere on Tuesday. (Since Musk was involved, we’ll even say it may have reached Mars.)

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We will never get tired of people calling him ‘spy banger.’

HAHAHAHA. Look at all of those AI-generated NPCs. That’s Kamala Harris’s base and they are excited

He has blocked this writer from his government account too, which is a big no-no according to SCOTUS. We would consider a class-action lawsuit against him, but we’re worried we might be paid in Yuan. 

To paraphrase Forrest Gump, ‘He’s … he’s not a smart man. But he knows what Chinese influence is.’ 

Oh, the CCP was definitely listening. We’re a little worried about what China might do between now and November if it looks to them like Trump will win. But whatever that might be, Swalwell will be getting a phone call from Fang Fang demanding more information, that’s for sure. 

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He’s so dumb, he never even learned the first rule of holes. 

They are super spooked. Harris’s honeymoon seems to be ending (though she’ll surely get a boost from the DNC next week), scandal-ridden Tim Walz never even had a honeymoon, and both Trump and his running mate J.D. Vance — who is very good at this campaigning thing — seem to be finding their stride.

Trump got a billion people to hear at least some of what he had to say Monday night, while Harris still won’t sit for a single interview or hold a single press conference.

Yes, even without the Musk interview, we shouldn’t forget that the left was going into fits of rage on Monday and Tuesday simply because Trump has returned to Twitter. 

Let’s hear it for ‘mean tweets’ over ‘record inflation and a broken border.’

Eeew. 

But also … LOL. 

Someone should probably look into that. Swalwell might be as ‘real’ as the crowd sizes at Harris’s rallies. 

He takes L’s like he’s trying for a gold medal, doesn’t he? (We’re not sure which nation’s flag would be raised behind him though if he ever did get a medal.)

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What a beautiful Community Note. At the time of this writing, it hadn’t received enough ratings to be officially attached to Swalwell’s tweet, but that surely is only a matter of time. 

Never let him forget that we know China owns him. Never. 

Gross. Close that mouth. We don’t know where it’s been (but we have some guesses). 

He is indeed broken. Irreparably. Not even the best Chinese engineers can fix him. 

But it’s still fun when he tweets because we get to laugh at him all over again.