Light As a Feather, Stiff As a Board

It never really made much sense when you stopped and thought about it — the “Light As a Feather, Stiff As a Board” game — but then again, 8-year-old girls don’t do a lot of stopping and thinking — particularly not when they’re at slumber parties. All I know is that it was a staple at every slumber party I attended back in the day (roughly, the mid-late 70s). 

For those unfamiliar, one girl lays on the floor on her back with the others all sitting around her, two fingers of each hand underneath her. Someone sits at her head, rubs her temples, and tells a spooky story — usually about her untimely demise — and when that’s done, everyone chants, “Light as a feather, stiff as a board,” before attempting to lift her. In theory, this is easily done because now, in some trancelike state, she’s somehow able to levitate. In practice, it either works due to the group effort…or it doesn’t. And either way, it usually quickly devolves into giggles and squeals. 

Why am I bringing this up? Well, the phrase popped into my head Thursday night as I watched the vaunted Kamala Harris CNN interview. More feathery than Doonesbury’s Dan Quayle, more wooden than a Viking longship, Harris continues to underwhelm, and I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what the heck her deal is. 

I actually discussed this a bit on NewsTalkSTL Thursday afternoon as I guest-hosted the “Tim Jones and Chris Arps Show.” I had Tony Colombo in studio with me and, at that point, having seen the teaser clip put out by CNN ahead of the interview’s airing, I was remarking on: A) how awkward the shot/set-up looked; and B) how difficult it is to fathom Harris being as bad as she is at something that should come easy to her at this point. 

Body Language Expert: In CNN Interview, Kamala Harris ‘Lacked Confidence’

Even CNN Has Questions and Is Now Fact-Checking Kamala Interview,So You Know It Did Not Go Well

Gamblers Have Another Interesting Reaction to Kamala Harris Appearing on Camera

To be honest, on some level, it actually offends me. As someone who spent close to 30 years as a practicing attorney, trying cases — in what was largely a man’s world — it makes zero sense for her to have such little command and confidence when speaking extemporaneously. Granted, not everyone is cut out for that sort of work, but then, you don’t seek out a profession or position that literally requires that of you — and you sure as heck don’t seek out the presidency of the United States. 

It’s weird. Something’s off. And I’m far from alone in that observation.

Kamala Harris is trying to sell herself as the bossest of all girl bosses. This is her shot — her chance to grab the brass ring. And she’s showing zero confidence in her ability to do so. So why on earth should we, the American people, place trust in her, when she clearly doesn’t even have that trust in herself? 

As difficult as it is to fathom, this is the person vying to be President of the United States. This is someone asking the American people to give her tremendous power. We’ll, of course, be covering it all between now and the election. To help us do what we do best, please consider upgrading to a VIP account.  VIP status will open a plethora of stories and podcasts here at RedState. And remember that a Gold-level account gets you access to all of our sister sites in Townhall Media: PJ Media, Twitchy, Hot Air, Bearing Arms, and Townhall.com. Use promo code FIGHT for a 60% discount today only!