Voting for Most Obnoxious Leftist Neighbor Is Now Open

  

Shortly after Donald Trump was elected, and while Hilary Clinton was still curled up in a fetal ball of rage, the Alexandria, Virginia, City Council issued a proclamation declaring:  

“Alexandria, Virginia, is a city of kindness and compassion. We are a thriving community of engaged residents with strong ideals of peace, community service, and both shared and diverse cultures” and its citizens should be ‘free from fear.’”

Alexandria denounced:

“Hate speech, hate crimes, harassment, racial bias, anti-Semitism, Islamophobia, anti-immigrant activity, and harmful bias and discrimination in all forms.” 

Resident Emily Baden didn’t get the memo.  

Emily Baden is an actress. Kind of. Like most people with “actor” on their resume, Emily isn’t terribly good at acting. At least not for a living. Her last credited part was six years ago, but in 2024, she saw her fortunes break. Emily’s big break turned on her self-generated kerfuffle with Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito and his wife, Martha-Ann.  

Emily was the jerk neighbor who, starting in 2020, erected yard signs denouncing Donald Trump. In 2020, at the age of 36, Emily Baden and her boyfriend had moved in with her mom. Whether she and her beau occupied the basement isn’t known. Her mom lived on the same street as Samuel and Martha-Ann Alito. Following the 2020 election, Emily saw an opportunity to star in the coveted part as: “Most Obnoxious Leftist Neighbor.”

With too much time on her hands, Emily got out her crayons, glitter, and poster boards, and erected homemade signs on her mom’s front yard. Emily was proud of her work, and of her diction. Pulitzer-worthy signs like “F*** Trump” and “Bye Don” went up.  A few weeks later, the signs were down. Martha-Ann noted that the signs were down, and assumed that Baden had had a moment of sanity and had taken the cuss-laden signs down. Alas, the sign had been blown down by the wind. No sanity from Emily. 

There was a part to play, and neighbors to offend. Emily put the signs back up.   

Then, January 6th happened. Emily felt a surge of adrenaline and self-righteousness. She pulled out her crayons and glitter and poster boards again. More signs went up. Clever signs like ubiquitous: “F*** Trump” and “Trump is a Fascist”. Emily was channeling Norma Desmond. Emily was ready for her close-up. Although Emily’s mom thought they were tacky, the signs littered her lawn. 

On the day of Biden’s inauguration, Emily and her boyfriend drove past the Alito home, twice. Because, well, once is not enough. Emily Baden claimed that Alito’s wife “spit” at her car. Emily called the cops. She called Alito’s wife a “c***”.” Emily probably thought her antics would lead to more parts.  Sadly, for Emily, she didn’t get much screen time in 2021. Her fame as a leftist firebrand had to wait. 2021 faded to black. 

In 2023, leftists started a new smear campaign directed at the Supreme Court. Emily saw an opportunity. The New York Times picked up the story, as did every other outlet willing to smear Supreme Court Justices. Emily was, again, ready for her close-up.  

Baden got her 15 minutes of fame via CNN. 

Then, Baden’s short career as a leftist hero faded to black. Baden remains in the running for “Most Obnoxious Leftist Neighbor,” but she has stiff competition. A short, electric rainbow bus ride from the Alitos’ home is the neighborhood of Del Rey. Residents of Del Rey also didn’t get the council’s memo.  

In 2022, JD Vance and his wife bought a home in Del Rey. JD was quickly greeted with the warmth and “inclusion” the City Council proclaimed six years prior. Of course, the opposite was true. Vance was treated as an interloper – an unwelcome invader. Shortly after moving in, an anonymous “artist” “yarn-bombed” Vance’s home. The person told the Washingtonian:  

“Knowing that this person has been really publicly antagonistic to LGBTQ people, to immigrants, to women’s rights—it felt appropriate to publicly declare what we stand for in this community.”

Mollie Hemmingway at the Federalist wrote:  

Democrat activist Kevin Saucedo-Broach suggested that the entire family be moved from their home rather than temporarily close the park. Journalist Meghan McCarthy, who couldn’t stop posting about her visceral hatred of Vance and the location of his family home, said in a now-deleted post that he never should have moved his family to a location with a park nearby. One neighbor with “be good to people & animals” in his X bio called for protest. Others were similarly outraged.

Another Del Rey intolerant named Becky Hammer didn’t hide behind anonymity – she organized a “Harris for President” aka “Harass the Vance Family” event at the small park right next to the Vance home. Then, Becky hid. 

Becky isn’t an actor, she’s a lawyer. A Harvard-educated lawyer. Becky knows she has a First Amendment right to be an ass. She and many of her leftist neighbors are invested in being asses. Although Becky avoided advertising her event on “X” because she claims it’s owned by a “white supremacist,” she auditioned her moral outrage on other social media. Her other accounts are also locked. Her audition for “Most Obnoxious Leftist” was a strong effort.

Oddly, there’s no updated City Council proclamation calling for love and hugs for the Vance family. Alexandria residents display “Hate Has No Home Here,” but like most leftists, their tolerance ends when someone disagrees with them.

Meh – there are too many worthy nominees for just one “Most Obnoxious Leftist Neighbor.” Sorry, Emily, your closeup will have to wait.